Planning a Photogenic Wedding - Part 3
Today’s post is part three of a three part series, courtesy of Darbi G. of Darbi G. Photography. Darbi is a recent bride in addition to being a wedding photographer herself. This gives her a very unique perspective on wedding planning. You can find her blog here. Stacy Reeves of Dallas, Texas provided the gorgeous photography.
Be sure to read part 1 and part 2 of this series for other great suggestions on making your wedding photography fabulous!
7. Receptions should be the icing on the cake.
This is the time in which you, as the bride and groom, can really make an impression. Good food, free drinks…those are great to have. But the one piece of advice I can give to you… is… if you can’t a afford a kick-butt cover band (we couldn’t!!) HIRE A DJ.
I know, it’s probably tempting to save the $700-800 and get a friend to just push play on that iPod. But a good DJ can make a difference. If I’ve heard one thing about our wedding time and again, it’s that our DJ, James Cloyd of Complete Music, absolutely ROCKED. Seriously. He worked the reception and I didn’t have to worry about a thing. The guests had TONS OF FUN. Because of him!
The timeline of the reception had a lot to do with it. I’ve been to many receptions at which it’s stop and go all night. And the dancing that everyone wants to do just keeps getting pushed back. Before the bride and groom know it, everyone but a few close friends have bailed.
I asked my DJ to write our own timeline. I told him what all I wanted to do, but I wanted him to put it in the order that he, as a DJ, thought would work best for the guests. And he loved that I asked it! Because now he could finally use his own expertise. Man, he NAILED it.
This was the order of our events. And it went sooo smoothly. I highly, highly, highly recommend taking this to your DJ and discussing it with them to make the perfect timeline for your wedding.
- Cocktail hour (while wedding party was getting pics taken)
- Guests take seats/wedding party introduced
- Bride & groom immediately cut cake (only cut it…don’t serve it!! Be sure to let the photographer know in advance so that they can get photos of the cake before it is cut, and so that they are ready to take the cake-cutting pictures.)
- Father of bride does welcome toast
- Blessing
- Dinner served
- Toasts
- B&G restroom break/make rounds to visit
- Cake is served
- While people are eating cake:
- Specialty dances (the bride & groom’s first dance, father/daughter, mother/son)
- Bouquet and garter toss
- Wedding party dance to open up the dance floor
- Dance set of music
- Second set: During this time, I urge you to go outside or somewhere on premises somewhere with your photographer for a few more shots of just the two of you - like the photo at the end of this post
- Dollar dance or any other traditions like this
- DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY!!!
By pushing everything that is considered an “event” into the beginning, this keeps the momentum going. If people want to dance, they will get their chance without having to wait all night long…or without having to start dancing…get in the groove…and then have to abandon the dance floor so you can throw your bouquet, etc.
And don’t be afraid to spice up the reception even more with your own customs, or fun things like a candy toss for the kids (so they don’t have to steal the bouquet/garter belt) etc. Again, use your wedding as a way to show guests who you both are!! It’s a once-in-a-lifetime party that you are throwing for those you love the most. At Darbi & Neil’s Wedding, a friend of theirs performed a special song just for them!
If you have any questions or comments about what I’ve recommended, please share! Or any of your own tips??? Spill the beans!
I hope every bride and groom gets their perfect day. It’s such a great way to start off a life together!
Planning a Photogenic Wedding - Part 2
Today’s post is courtesy of Darbi G. of Darbi G. Photography. Darbi is a recent bride in addition to being a wedding photographer herself. This gives her a very unique perspective on wedding planning. You can find her blog here. Stacy Reeves of Dallas, Texas provided the wedding photographs.
Be sure to read part 1 of this series for other great suggestions on making your wedding photography fabulous!
4. Ceremonies don’t have to be boring.
There aren’t many ceremonies from which guests walk away and say: Wow. That was a great ceremony. Why? Because so few couples stray from the traditional elements. Tradition is beautiful. But it’s even more beautiful if it’s complemented by something that screams who YOU are…as a couple. I know a lot of what you can and cannot do is based on the religion or the site rules. But you can still inject some flavor by:
- Writing your own vows
- Choosing music that means something
- Having special dedication moments
- Using readings that speak to your relationship
- Having friends/family sing
- Taking time to plan small details such as programs, ceremony favors, lighting embellishments
- And most of all…don’t be afraid of humor!!
5. What you put on your feet matters.
Most people can’t see the bride’s feet. But that gives you even more reason to want to show them off!! Put on some shoes that are comfy…but that also play up to the feel of your wedding. Even just wearing a pair that are in your wedding colors can do A LOT. And it will make the bride feel sexier, too…
6. The little things count.
One of my favorite parts of weddings is the details. You don’t have to spend a lot of money to bring it all together. Make things yourself. Check out Etsy.com to get inexpensive, but personalized elements for your wedding day, such as:
- Guestbook
- Favor tags
- Ring presentation dishes/pillows
- Flower girl baskets
- Garter belts
- Cake toppers
- Bouquet charms
- Photo display
- Candles
- Gifts
- Card holder
- And so forth!!! The possibilities are endless!
You’ll be surprised how far the little things go in making a wedding FEEL and LOOK special.
Be sure to check back tomorrow for part 3 of the series on how to make your wedding photogenic!
Planning a Photogenic Wedding - Part 1
Today’s post is part one of a three part series, courtesy Darbi G. of Darbi G. Photography of Columbia, Missouri. Darbi is a recent destination wedding bride in addition to being a wedding photographer herself. This gives her a very unique perspective on planning your wedding for spectacular photography. You can find her blog here.
Stacy Reeves of Dallas, Texas and Lara Adkins of Omaha, Nebraska photographed Darbi & Neil’s Nebraska wedding.
Because we planned the day so that we weren’t rushed for pictures, we now have the most amazing memories captured for forever. And when it comes to weddings, “forever” is a good word. 
So anyway, having several weeks to simmer, I can look back on the wedding, and the year before the BIG DAY, and share with brides-to-be some tips. Not only from the perspective of a bride. But from the standpoint of someone who has been to many weddings – as a guest or as a photographer.
I don’t claim to be an expert. But I can claim having not one complaint about how our own wedding and our own wedding photographs turned out. You expect, and deserve, great images from your wedding day. But some of the “burden” of getting the best images possible falls in your lap.
So read on to learn how YOU can set the scene. And get your photographer even more excited to shoot your wedding.
1. Location, location, location.
Location sets the mood, location maintains the mood, and location impacts memories. Location ALSO affects your photographs. Most churches aren’t sources of fabulous lighting. But you have tons of control over where you choose to have your reception. One of the best decisions I made was to find a venue that had floor to almost-ceiling windows. That meant that there was good lighting up until the time to dance. PERFECT for photos. AND perfect for me, the bride, to take in all the faces of those I love who were around me…and to see that all the hard work I put into the reception details paid off.
2. Be aware of sunset hours. And plan accordingly.
Because good photography revolves around good lighting, sunset times are crucial to know. After you choose your date, look up what time the sun will go down here. The two hours prior to sunset are what we photographers call “the golden hours.” Why? Because the lighting is perfect and soft. GOLDEN. So now that you know what time the sun sets…what to do then?
Well…if you’re not seeing your honey before you walk down the aisle, and you want to get stellar pictures of just the two of you…and pictures of the entire wedding party doing something fun and cool outside, schedule the ceremony so that you still have at least 1.5 hours of sunlight to play with. If you’re doing a receiving line after the ceremony, don’t start counting that 1.5 hours until that is finished. Receiving lines typically last 30-45 minutes (Even if you swear you’re going to get through yours in 15 minutes, it just doesn’t work.)
On that same token, if you’re having an outdoor wedding without shade, steer clear from ceremonies that take place when the sun is directly overhead. First of all, it might be hot for your guests (assuming it’s during late spring/summer months). Secondly, direct sun causes harsh shadows and washes faces out. So instead, aim for that time in the afternoon when the sun has started going down in the horizon. Sun coming in at an angle makes everything look better. To guests…and to your eyes when you look at pictures later.
3. Your photographs should be a priority. Therefore, whom you choose for a photographer should not be a light-hearted decision. Weeks or months after the wedding, when the buzz has worn off, you will have your photos to look at and relive the best day of your life. If you don’t have good images, you’ll be upset. You might even cry. And you might be filled with that deep sense of regret because you cannot go back in time to get those coveted images with your best girl friends, or with your husband, or he with his friends, etc. It’s done and over with.
But if you go into the wedding planning with a timeline that takes into account the photography, you’ll be so happy. On the day of, and for all the years to follow.
Here is a timeline based on how long “events” typically take on the day of the wedding. This is based on the bride and groom not seeing each other until the ceremony. (Don’t forget to allow for the time it takes to get from event to event and place to place….) If it looks like there is too much time designated for something, that’s a good thing. Everything always takes longer than planned.
2-3 hours: girls at salon or wherever to do their hair and makeup
2.5 hours: girls putting on dresses/finishing touches (guys getting ready during this time)
35 minutes: group girl shots
35 minutes: group guy shots
35 minutes: any other shots that would be easier to take before the ceremony
30 minutes: all bridal party members should have this time to chill while ceremony guests are being seated
30 minutes-1 hour: Ceremony
45 minutes: receiving line
30 minutes: formal pictures with family (for 15 groups)
1-1.5 hours: wedding party pics and bride & Groom shots. (if you choose a location that is close to the reception or the ceremony site, that works perfectly!!!)
And then it’s reception time. Tips for THAT will be in the next post - be sure to check back tomorrow for more details on planning for your wedding photography!
Destination Wedding Podcast!
When planning your destination wedding, it is smart to check out as many resources as possible. Now there is one more — wedding planning goes high tech, and there is a destination wedding planning podcast out there for you to listen to! Check it out at the wedding planning audiocast site.
While you’re there, be sure to check out all of the other great podcasts full of wedding planning information! You can check them all out here! Lots of topics covered, from wedding planners, photographers, cakes, and … well, almost everything else you can think of!
Getting Your Dress to Your Destination Wedding
Having a destination wedding and trying to figure out how to get your dress there? You have a few options. You can ship it via FedEx so the dress is tracked — but you always run the risk of it getting lost, especially if your destination wedding is held out of the country.
You can also try to arrange with your airline beforehand to use the first class coat closet for your dress. (Just remember that “value” airlines like Southwest do not have this option, unfortunately.) That way your dress is actually in your possession from start to finish, as long as you are able to find a sympathetic flight attendant to help you with proper storage.
We drove - 12 hours - to our wedding, and kept my dress spread out in the backseat. (It was carefully hidden in a garment bag, of course, so the groom did not see it.) Even so, my dress still required steaming when we arrived in New Orleans.
I have a close friend that flew her dress from New York to Florida in an American Airlines first class coat closet — and even though she had the cabinet all to herself, her dress still needed spot-pressing as well. It’s best to check with your hotel or resort to see if they offer dry cleaning services on site — or to at least get a recommendation early and let the cleaners you choose know of the circumstances beforehand.
In our case, as long as we got my dress in to the cleaners by 9 a.m. on Friday, they guaranteed to have it ready by that day’s close of business for our wedding on Saturday. They had known to plan for its arrival several weeks in advance (and my dress wasn’t overly ornate).
- By Robyn Pollman
What a Wreck!
I wouldn’t wish a bad cake experience on anyone, but the Cake Wrecks site is hysterical! Thanks to Sasha at Sparkliatti for sharing the link!
Don’t want a Cake Wreck? How about some delicious chocolate cupcakes instead? Check out the Planner Pages, where Brenda the intern has posted a very delicious sounding recipe! Whip some up! After all whose wedding cake is it anyways?
Don’t Need Nothing But a Good Time!
What an absolutely fun and fabulous idea. Jannine was planning an ’80s theme wedding reception, and included a line on the RSVP card asking guests to “Suggest Your Favorite ’80s Song”. She said her family was skeptical at first, but in the end they got suggestions like We Got the Beat by The Go Go’s, We’re Not Gonna Take It by Twisted Sister, Melt With You by Modern English, and Raspberry Beret by Prince.
I’m a huge Go Go’s fan, and really I would have been happy having any of these songs played at my own reception, so I think it is a fabulous and FUN way to include your guests in your planning!
Speaking of planning, she gives some really, really great advice in her post:
Some advice:
Before you even start planning a wedding, discuss with your fiancé what you really want out of your wedding. Do you want a big or small wedding? Where do you want it? Why do you want it? Last November, sitting on the beach in Kauai, we discussed all of these things. For us, having our friends and family be part of what we are committing to is very important. We want to have a really fun party to celebrate. However, we do not want to make a mockery of our vows so we are having a separate morning ceremony up a mountain canyon. This will be simple and sweet, no mullets, and crimped hair. After an afternoon of relaxing in the mountains we will gather again for the 80’s reception….good times!
I can’t find any information on how it all turned out - the wedding was a few weeks ago - but it sounds like it was a beautiful ceremony followed by a reception where the Guests Just Wanna Have Fun!
Have a fun wedding or reception idea we just have to know about? Tell us!
Map It!
I don’t know how I missed this site before, but what a cool thing to have for your wedding day! You can create a (free!) wedding map to share with all of your guests. Not only can you note all the wedding locations like the ceremony location and the reception venue, but you can also note things like restaurants, hotels, beauty salons, and your favorite nearby attractions. This is especially great for your out of town guests who might need some recommendations on things to do while they are in town for your wedding. I love it!
You can also store all of your vendor contact information on your map, hidden from public view, so that you have all of your information stored in one place.
If you make one, be sure to check out their tips page for some cool information on how to make your map fabulous!
Have you used Wedding Mapper? What did you think of it?
Wedding Timelines
Many thanks to Anne Ruthmann for today’s post and fabulous photographs! The wedding timeline is such a huge factor in your wedding day - here are some tips to help it go smoothly! You can find the original post on her blog here.
Your timeline is one of the biggest factors in the success of your event. So many things go into creating a timeline that works, so I wanted to share a few ideas about things to consider when it comes to creating your perfect wedding day timeline.
Getting Ready
Most weddings that start late are because of hair & makeup. Doing a trial can not only help give you a good estimate of how much time it will take, but it will help you figure out exactly what you want your wedding day style to be so that you aren’t spending time figuring it out on the wedding day. You also have to consider the benefits and drawbacks about where you’ll be getting ready and how many people from your bridal party will be getting ready with you. Whether you get ready at a salon or have a stylist come to you, figure that each person will need about one hour of a stylist’s time, and the bride may need two hours or more depending on the complexity of the styling. So while one stylist could take care of 5 girls in 5-6 hours, two stylists may be able to do the same work in only 2.5-3 hours. If bridesmaids are planning to use their own stylists or go to their own salon, suggest that they make their appointment at least 2 hours plus travel before they need to be anywhere.
Getting ready at a salon can give you access to more stylists at once as well as credit card processing and any other amenities that the salon offers. Having stylists come to you at your home, hotel, or ceremony site can allow you to roll out of bed at the last minute, have snacks or drinks of your choice on hand, and hang out in your pajamas until you’re ready to get dressed. You may also want to take into consideration the kind of environment that helps you feel more relaxed. Some people may think a hotel room is great until they have 10 people in the same room all running around frantically while others feel uneasy starting the day with navigating traffic alone and being away from everything else they need to get ready. Choose an option that will help you start your day off right.
When considering where to get dressed, take into consideration how much stuff you’ll have to bring with you as well as how comfortable you feel traveling in your dress. Some people prefer to get dressed at their ceremony site so that they don’t have to risk getting their gown dirty or wrinkled by riding in a car or limo. Others prefer to get dressed at their home or hotel so that they don’t have to lug a bunch of items to their ceremony site and repack it after the ceremony. No solution is better than any other, they are just different preferences. If you plan your photographer to be there while you get ready, you may also want to consider the surroundings in which your getting ready moments will be photographed, as well as any travel time involved between locations.
Portraits
Some photographers are very particular about when and how they do portraits, so you’ll want to consult with your photographer to define the best plan of action for portraits based on your photographer’s preferred working style and the kind of posed images you want. If you’re trying to decide between portraits before or after the ceremony, here are a few things to consider: Before the ceremony, your makeup and outfits are fresh, you can have a private moment together before everyone arrives and pulls you in multiple directions, and you can reduce the amount of time that guests wait after the ceremony before sitting down for dinner. After the ceremony you may have to wait for all of your guests clear out before you can begin portraits, but you may care slightly less about the condition of your gown or tux and be willing to take a few more risks when it comes to creative portraits. Whatever you choose, make sure that the flowers will be ready when and where your portraits will be taken. The time of day may also influence when you would do most of your portraits, especially if you plan to have an evening or sunset ceremony. If your guests will be heading directly to the reception site, consider how long they will be waiting for your arrival. Whether you choose to do portraits before or after, the ceremony itself will remain the most powerful and emotional experience of the day.
Ceremony
Your officiant is going to be the best guide as to how long your ceremony is going to take. Guests generally start arriving up to 30 minutes before the scheduled starting time for the wedding (really!), which means that the wedding party and family need to be ready to receive guests or be out of view from guests as they arrive. There’s a myth that most weddings start late. Maybe it’s just my fabulous brides, but most weddings I’ve been to start on time or within 5 minutes of being on time! Some ceremony locations have strict times for when weddings need to be out of the site in order to accommodate another service or perhaps another wedding, which is why it’s even more important for your wedding to begin on time.
Receiving Guests
There are several ways to receive your guests and however you choose to do this, it is generally expected that at some point you will greet each of your guests. Here are a few different ways along with their various benefits or drawbacks…
- Pew by Pew (or row by row): this option is a very personal and intimate way to greet your guests and generally only involves the bride & groom greeting each guests personally as they leave from their seats. This option allows guests to remain seated until they are greeted and encourages guests to leave the ceremony site after they’ve been greeted. This method generally takes about 15 seconds per guest, which is only slightly longer than it would take for all of your guests to leave the ceremony site anyway. If you plan to make a grand exit with bubbles, birds, paper airplanes, or anything else, consider receiving your guests immediately after the ceremony.
- Receiving Line: when the receiving line happens immediately following the ceremony, it often ends up involving both sets of parents as well as the bride & groom at the end of the aisle or in a lobby immediately following the ceremony or at the entrance to the reception. Guests generally stand in line waiting to be received, but can make an alternate escape if needed. With more people involved in the receiving line, it can take a little more time per guest, but the wait in line generally keeps people moving fairly quickly. When done at the ceremony site, it’s still about 15 seconds per person. If you do a receiving line at the reception as your guests arrive, you can benefit from having a drink nearby, but you need to make sure that you can arrive before your guests. When done at your reception site, it generally takes 30-60 minutes because you’re greeting guests as they leisurely arrive.
- Cocktail Mingle: if you can plan to be a part of your cocktail time, you may be able to mingle with your guests during this time and consider it as an opportunity to greet your guests. You might not be able to visit with everyone, and people will definitely feel more comfortable taking more of your time with a drink in hand, but if formal greetings aren’t for you, than this could be a great alternative as long as you’re comfortable “working the room”.
- Table by Table: this has become more popular as churches have been more strict about the time that weddings can remain in the church after the ceremony (perhaps another good reason to schedule portraits before the ceremony), but this is by far the most time consuming method of greeting your guests. It sounds good in theory- greet tables of 8-10 people at a time during dinner, but it often takes 5 minutes per table unless you’re really good about not being too friendly. Because this often happens after dinner is served, it typically means that every other table is sitting around waiting for something to begin while the plates have already been cleared from their table. Even though I did this for my own wedding (hey, it sounded good to me too) I remember feeling pressured to visit each table, but I also felt as though the party was slowing down because we felt we needed to get to every table before we could move on. In retrospect, I probably would have chosen one of the other options if I knew then what I know now.
- No Receiving of Guests: I’ve also been to a few weddings where there just wasn’t any sort of greeting the guests. I’m not sure what the etiquette books would say about this, but hey it’s your party and you should do what you want to!
Reception
Whether your reception is immediately following or at a set time, guests will gladly enjoy cocktails and hors d’oeuvres for up to an hour before getting anxious about your arrival. If you have an extended amount of time between your ceremony and reception (more than two hours) than it may be good to provide suggestions for your guests as to where they could stop in the meantime. Less than two hours and you may have guests who arrive at the reception site early. If your ceremony and reception are in the same place, a cocktail hour may or may not be needed- obviously your reception site will have the best recommendations for you. The scheduled dinner time is often the least flexible time in the wedding day since the kitchen has been working most of the day to get the meal provided by a certain time.
If you’re doing a grand entrance, it takes about 15 minutes to get wedding parties organized and guests seated before announcing the bride & groom. Toasts generally don’t take more than 15 minutes (unless you know you have a long winded friend or family member) and can be done before the meal begins, while the meal is in progress, or after the meal. If you have champagne service for the toasts, you’ll want to know when the reception site can pour the champagne for the guests. If you plan to have your cake served as dessert, you may want to consider cutting it as part of your grand entrance so that it can be served immediately after dinner. The later your cake is cut, the less likely it is that everyone will actually get a piece of cake, or even know that it was cut, which could result in lots of left overs. Your caterer will give you the best idea of how long the table or buffet service will take for the number of guests that you have. Buffet service often takes less time than plated dinners because everything is served at once versus several different courses. After dinner is served, there’s generally a good two hours of partying if you have a young and lively crowd. Most older people or parents with kids at home tend to leave by 10-10:30 pm, leaving you with the people who will generally stay until the bar closes. Of course, every crowd is different and obviously you will know your crowd better than anyone else.
Final Thoughts
You hire professionals because they are experts at what they do. They’ve seen it all and they know what works and what doesn’t work. Don’t be afraid to call on the people you’ve hired to help you create a plan for success. They want to make sure you and your guests have a great experience and are often happy to help make sure that happens.
Anne Ruthmann is an international award winning Lifestyle Portrait and Wedding Photographer specializing in emotional and artistic photojournalism, soon to be based in the Boston, MA area with frequent travel to Chicago, IL; Detroit, MI; St. Louis, MO; Washington, DC; Los Angeles, CA; and all over New England! Her work has been seen in Brides, The Knot, and Photo District News magazines. Please visit her online portfolio and her blog to learn more about her and her work.
Thanks, AllTop!
What an awesome surprise to get on the computer this morning and discover that we’ve been listed at Weddings.AllTop.com along with some of our absolute favorite sites! Sweet! Thanks, AllTop!
AllTop is an awesome site that gathers together in one place all the top websites. They use RSS, and if you move your mouse over a headline, you’ll see the first paragraph or so of a post. Click on the title, and you’ll be taken to the site. They cover a whole variety of topics: Weddings, Travel, Humor, and so much more - it is really an awesome way to discover new sites that you might not otherwise know about!
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